The joy and the challenge of working with women and girls in India

There is a certain dichotomy between the existing culture in India and the rhetoric around it. There is always a great deal of talk about our Indian values and ancient culture. To some extent, every political party will bring things around to praising these Indian values where women know their place and therefore, are respected for their position in society. Similarly, men know how to reciprocate with respect and a sense of honor. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Deviant behavior of all sorts is common among individuals, families, communities and society at large. India is an established patriarchy, and men (on the street/in the workplace/at home) will push their advantage (either alone or with the collusion of their friends and family) to the max. In the best case scenario, they will remain quiet, witness what is happening and advocate for the status quo. And like all popular movements, the other side is often co-opted, either willingly or unwillingly. Some women will also work to re-enforce the patriarchy and become an active component for propogation of the same.

At the children’s Non Formal Education Center in Benaras’ red light district of Sivdaspur. The girls in this picture are working on henna and hair styling.

Photo credit: Guria

What is interesting though, and surprising, is that large numbers of women, while acutely aware of this phenomenon of male domination, are not willing to just stay quietly behind the scenes or in their place. Women in India, even in places where the odds are stacked against them, appear to know what they ‘want’ for themselves, how they ‘want’ to move forward. There is a push from their side which demands greater freedom, greater voice - just like a rushing waterfall that cannot be held back. There are too many droplets of water to be pushed back into place. And just like water they surge forward.

This is what I appreciate about working in India. Women will talk, they will fight, they will have opinions and they will try their hardest to get their children ahead, if they haven’t been able to do so themselves. This is the real joy of working here - not that the problems are managable; not that it is easy to unravel the threads of individual lives out of the morass of a malfunctioning system; not that the current power structures make it possible to get a lot done quickly. Not for any of these reasons, but because the women have spirit, they see what is going on and they have the capacity to speak up and work both within the existing systems and outside of them, if pushed. This is the real joy of working with women in India.

Whether they are the working professionals in NGOs, the volunteer sanginis in Mumbai, the girls and their mothers who are survivors of rape and abuse, the nurses, doctors, lawyers and clinical psychologists who are working with other women - they are inspiring in their determination to push through the barriers as best as they can. The circumstances are tough but the women will persevere.

With the nurses at Mumbai’s Nair Hospital. they are all part of the Core Committee that works with SNEHA to identify and report cases of violence against patients who come in to the hospital.

Photo Credit: SNEHA Mumbai